Past Pains
by Kitty15
Summary: A story about harper and what he keeps under his pillow. FINISHED


Disclaimer: Don't own 'em, wish I did. Not getting' paid, wish I was.  
  
Dylan walked steadily to the Eureka Maru.  
  
"Harper, can I talk to you for a moment?" He asked as he walked into the crew quarters and saw Harper sitting on his bunk.  
  
"Sure boss bug. What'd yah need?" Harper said resting his elbows on his knees.  
  
"Uh, I know Beka didn't want me to ask you this, but......what do you keep under your pillow?" Dylan asked shyly.  
  
"Oh that." Harper said reaching back under his pillow and pulling out a picture. He jumped down, sat, cross-legged, on one of the bottom bunks, and then motioned Dylan to sit next to him. Dylan did so and was gently handed a very well kept photo of a young girl. She couldn't have been more than sixteen. Her copper colored hair fell in gentle curls past her shoulders; her bright blue eyes seemed to look straight through you. She was short and just shy of scrawny. She wore rags that barely covered the essentials and shoes that looked too small, but the smile on her face made everything seem all right.  
  
"Hey, quit gawkin'!" Harper said. He snatched back the picture, careful not to damage it in any way. As he looked at the picture Dylan saw something in his eyes that had never been there before. Dylan knew that leek well. It was the way Sara looked at him the first time she told him she loved him.  
  
"Why didn't Beka want me to see this?" He asked softly.  
  
"Because then I always say I'm gonna go back to earth and save her"  
  
"She's alive?"  
  
"That's what bothers Beka the most. She's not. She died not even ten minutes before I left with Beka."  
  
"I'm so sorry Harper."  
  
"Why? You didn't kill her."  
  
"I just meant that....."  
  
"I know. It's just that, personally, Aly is a very sensitive subject."  
  
"I guess all I was saying was that I know how you feel."  
  
"How?"  
  
"I lost Sara."  
  
"Oh yeah, that's the same thing." Harper replied, his voice dripping with sarcasm.  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"You lost Sara because you were trapped in a black hole for three hundred years. I lost Aly because of my own bad judgment."  
  
"Harper, I don't understand. How could your judgment take Aly away from you?"  
  
"Well, when Beka and I blasted into the armory we had already had to surpass dozens of Neitzchean defense systems. So, I had to jack in and scramble the sensors. Out of everyone in Boston, the Neitzcheans had only two choices. Aly and me; considering we're the only ones that they implanted with data ports. That's, actually, how we met."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yeah. I was, uh, eleven, which made Aly nine. I helped her escape a Dragon Tech lab."  
  
"Why'd you save her?"  
  
"I don't know. I just remember being terrified that I was gonna die and never see my parents again. I ended up saying a whole bunch of that stuff out loud and Aly just smiled at me and told me that everything would be okay and for some reason or another, I believed her. When I first went to leave, though, I was going to leave her, but she asked me to help her. So, I did and when we got outside and far enough away to be safe, she tackled me in this huge hug, and by tackled, I mean tackled. I ended up flat on my back, but Aly never let go. And, yah know, me being the hormone driven man that I am, we ended up having the best sex I have ever had. We'd been together ever since."  
  
"You're kidding about the whole sex thing, right?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Harper, she was nine."  
  
"So? Dylan, I had been having sex for food since I was seven, it was one of the few ways to survive."  
  
"Oh. How long were you two together?"  
  
"Seven years."  
  
"So the Nietzcheans went after Aly because she had a data port."  
  
"Pretty much."  
  
"I still don't see how this is your fault."  
  
"Because if I would have stayed home with her and the baby, like she asked me to she'd still be here. I would be holding her in my arms right now." Harper explained, tear welling up in his eyes.  
  
"But then you wouldn't have ever gotten off of earth."  
  
"It doesn't matter. I watched her die Dylan. I sat there holding her in my arms as she clung to me for dear life. I listened to her ask me to hold her tighter, I heard her say that she couldn't live without me, that she was afraid to die, and that she loved me more than anything. She told me that she was sorry she lost the baby, but then made me promise her something. She made me promise that I would live. No matter what. I told her I loved her and she died as I slowly rocked her back and forth and cried into her hair. My cousin Brendan found me a few minutes later. He told me he was sorry about Aly and the baby, I had to go and that he would take care of everything for her. So, I went with Beka. You can even ask her, I was suicidal for weeks, but every time I thought about it I could hear Aly ask me not to. Sometimes, I feel like she's right here with me, telling me that everything is gonna be alright." He said, with a few tears escaping his eyes.  
  
"I'm so sorry Harper. Is there anything you want me to do?"  
  
"Can I just have some time alone, please?"  
  
"Sure." Dylan said softly. He left quickly and quietly, leaving Harper to his thoughts. Harper crawled onto his bed and cried openly into his pillow. The entire time he was there, he could hear Aly's sweet honey voice whispering, "Shhh, it's okay, it'll be alright. I'm here." And he could feel her hand rubbing his back in soothing circles.  
  
The End. 


End file.
